


Attack on Titan

by Crimson_Hoodie



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: AU Fiction, Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crack, Gen, Mad Scientist, scientists - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-25
Updated: 2014-02-25
Packaged: 2018-01-13 19:17:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1237900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crimson_Hoodie/pseuds/Crimson_Hoodie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The SNK gang are all scientists in a space program and Eren is obsessed with a certain moon. Much crack ensues.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Attack on Titan

Eren was frantically motioning towards Armin. The shorter blonde was trying to ignore his friend and continue his conversation with the head director of the Shiganshina space program, Erwin Smith. 

“Good job on that new rocket camera prototype Arlert. If you keep this up, a promotion might be in your future.”

Armin saluted the director. “Thank you sir.”

Erwin smiled. “There’s no need to be so formal; we’re all friends here—“

Eren pushed his way between them and grabbed Armin's arm before dragging him away. 

“Excuse me sir, but I need Armin right away, the prototype is malfunctioning.”

“Eren!”

Armin looked back apologetically at his director before allowing himself to be dragged up to the labs.

“What do you mean the prototype is malfunctioning?! I worked all night to get out any bugs and glitches.”

“I lied; your work is perfect as always. I just needed you to come with me.”

Armin had a sinking feeling. “Eren this isn’t about that Saturnian moon is it?”

Eren’s eyes flashed with fire. “Of course it is! I’m telling you, that moon could knock the entire planet out of balance. “

Armin rolled his eyes as they finally reached the labs. Jean and Marco were on the far side of the room; probably working on developing the pictures from the 57th expedition into the final frontier. Eren pushed Armin in a chair and started pulling up the information on the moon in question.  
Connie walked in and looked over Eren’s shoulder. 

“What are ya pulling up Eren?”

Armin tried to catch his attention by shaking his head and putting his arms in a big ‘X’ formation, but it was too late. Eren spun on his heels and took a deep breath.

“It’s only the most important thing ever in the history of this space center!”

Armin cocked an eyebrow. “Come on, it’s not that big of a deal.”

Eren clenched his teeth. “Yes it is! The Saturnain moon, Titan, could easily mess up the gravitational pull of Saturn and cause it to careen out of orbit! We need to blow it out of the sky!”

“Doesn’t that seem a little...excessive?” Connie offered.

“DO YOU WANT TO DIE?!”

“Eren, calm down.” 

Mikasa walked in, wearing her trademark scarf, and put her hand on the raging scientist’s shoulder.

“They aren’t taking this seriously! This is a very grave situation!”

“What are you talking about brat?” The stoic second-in-command joined the group.

Armin intervened before Eren could go off again. “Eren’s just telling us about the Saturnain moon, Titan.”

“Oh?”

“We need to destroy it!”

“Do you have any scientific evidence that it’s a danger to humanity?”

“It’s off orbit and could change the course of orbit of Saturn!”

“Really.” Levi didn’t sound (or look) very impressed. 

“So can I have permission to destroy Titan?”

“Permission denied. We need to go the science department directors first for approval before blowing moons up.”

“But if we wait too long—“

Levi pulled a death glare that shut up the younger. “No buts. You will hold off until it’s approved by the board.”

With that the shorter man left with Connie, Mikasa, and Armin following behind. Eren slumped in the chair Armin just vacated and glared at the picture of Titan on the computer screen. He could even make out the bodies of water dubbed, Maria, on the moon’s surface. 

“I’m gonna take a break, meet me at the diner in ten minutes!” Marco said over his shoulder as he left the lab; shrugging off his white lab coat as he walked. 

This left Eren alone with Jean. Said horseface turned to watch Marco leave before locking eyes with blue-green ones. Both scientists glared at each other before returning to their previous tasks. Eren grumbled to himself as he thought about Titan. 

An idea struck him and he quickly looked at Jean to make sure he wasn’t watching before rolling his chair over to the laser controls. He quickly started typing in the coordinates of Titan. A few seconds later, the machine had locked onto the large moon. 

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?” Jean cried. 

Eren glanced over at Jean, a wild look in his eyes. Jean started to run at Eren to prevent the idiot from doing something stupid.

“I’M A FIRING MY LASERRRRRRR!!!” Eren screamed as he hit the button that shot off the new-technology, high-speed, capable-of-destroying-a-moon, lasers.

Jean tackled Eren to the ground, but the lasers had already been shot and the computer screen followed the progress of the deadly beams of light. 

After ten seconds, the cameras of nearby satellites recorded Titan being hit and exploding in a flash of light.

“It’s just like Call of Duty.” Eren whispered in awe.

“You idiot!” Jean yelled as he smacked Eren on the back of the head. 

Eren ignored him and stood proudly, putting his hands on his hips. “I have defeated the Titan!!!!”

Jean groaned and left the room before he was blamed for letting the crazy scientist blow up a moon.

**Author's Note:**

> I actually had this idea while doing research for another one of my fanfictions. Don't hurt me. 
> 
> And in case any of you are wondering, the moon, Titan, actually exists, and the large bodies of water found there are called Maria (which is another word for seas).


End file.
